Don't Grow Up

I feel like this may well be a pointless post because if you're reading this blog you're probably old enough to realise what every adult out there knows, life is easier as a kid.

While being an adult and doing what you want because you're paying for what you want has it's obvious perks, being an adult is difficult.

Paying the bills I can still deal with it but making difficult all decisions are challenging because literally every decision you make has an even bigger reaction. I'm a definite list person, it's the lawyer in me, weigh up pros and cons and your decision is easy, right? NO, wrong! 

And ofcourse while there are decisions concerning other people's lives I can give a to the point answer because, hellllllo, I don't have to deal with the consequences. 

The last 12 months of my life have  been extremely difficult in the decision department and I have had to rely heavily on my faith in God to get me through. I have made decisions where the people around me do not understand and even I at times did not see the bigger picture but I truly believe that taking a leap of faith is what's getting me through it all! 

So the point of this post is simple.... Don't Grow Up! When you're in your teens, think about that only enjoy those challeneges, when you're in your 20s stop stressing what your 30s will be like so that when you're in your 30s you don't have to wish to be your irresponsible 20-something year old self. 

Also, my one beauty item I can't live without is sunblock, I've mentioned this before and while I know some may argue sunblock is not a beauty item, my skin would beg to differ.Check out what the other ladies can't live without from the #Blogtober14 link up with Helene and Tay 

A song for you this weekend... 

What's your weekend plans???

Writers Block

Can I even call myself a writer? I mean writing here, in my little space of the cyber world, is that "writing"? I know it's no Shakesphere... but it's something, right?

So I am sort of freaking out because in two weeks time, I turn 27 years old. How the hell did that even happen?

In all honesty I tend to freak out a bit towards my birthday, much more that I do compared to any other event because I always used my birthday as the benchmark for where I saw myself by a certain time.

So anyway, while I deal with the inevitable freak out of what it means  for me to be 27 all the while staying present, I'll leave you with this simple question.. is this what life is about now?

Am I asking for too much?

This is my life, in it's simplest illustration

I found all the illustrations in this great article about 27 Shocking and Unexpected Facts You Learn in Your Twenties.

Anyway, I just realised that I didn't actually mention the fact that I am suffering from writers block due to the impending birthday however... let me go on with my day... have a good Tuesday all!

Letting go Versus Holding on

* Early Warning *  - this one has a more serious tone than usual...

In recent weeks I have been confronted with this notion of what it means to "let go"of a situation, emotion or person and it's kind of crazy that so many of us are walking around with this heaviness in our hearts or on our minds because we associate letting go of situations (or people) as an indication of a failure on our part.

We think, " what could I have done differently?" , "I failed at this" or "I am being selfish". I must admit, I think of this all the time whether I am struggling with letting go of my student life or a relationship or more frequently a friendship.

I think it is sad that so many of us feel like we need to stay in situations purely because we don't want to be perceived as mean that we end up holding onto relationships or things which are , for lack of a better word, rotting.

It is slightly crazy and similataneously sad that we feel that we have to validate someone (or ourselves) by continuing to be a part of a situation which we clearly do not want to be a part of. Perhaps I'm wrong and it's not that we don't want to be a part of their lives but rather, we no longer need to be a part of their lives.

Although I truly believe this...

Picture Credit

 

 

 

I think we battle to establish when a season has in fact ended.

 

I have been doing a lot of thinking about this topic and surprisngly, I have been having a number of conversations with different people about "letting go" and while I don't think I have all the answers (far from it) I can safely identify that I am a hoarder. Rather I have emotional hoarding tendancies.

 

When I was younger I used to hoard everything - no dirt though because my mom wouldn't allow me too. I still have letters from when I was in Grade 6 and 7 or class notes which we passed around throughout High School and while they are great to look back at, what am I holding onto them for?

 So now, I realise that I may just have emotional hoarding tendancies.... eek! BUT then it got me thinking, how many of us are emotional hoarders?

 

Is it that we are holding on to that person or thing for the memory we associate with it and are we afraid that if we let go of that person or thing that we are then letting go of the memory(ies) associated with that person? I'm honestly not sure..

Then I had an epiphany - it's not that I only need to let go of people or things but I have to be able to let go of the person I thought I would be and the things I had wanted to accomplish by now which I haven't and just make peace with the fact that if it was meant to happen for me, the way I wanted it to happen it would have but it clearly was not in God's plan and I need to live in His time and not my own.

This may be something you have heard before but when I actually committed to it made peace (along with a bottle of wine) with it and the person I am and the people who surround me I realised that there have been so many people that I have tried to hold onto but they have still left. Perhaps the only thing I should be holding onto is what's left of my sanity?

If you're looking for a sign to let go of whatever is holding you back, here it is....

 

Picture Credit

 

  I think the most important thing to learn is that letting go is hard and the feelings of letting go are difficult so don't judge yourself for snapping your fingers and still feeling..